Brooke (littertraining) wrote,

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It could get worse....

This has been kind of depressing week for me. Work was so bad today! Customers were complaining out of their asses and I had so much running around to do! In the midst of all of this Aaron calls me at work and tells me that he didn't remember me saying that I worked today- which kind of tells me that he's not listening to me at all because I must of told him 5 million times! But maybe I'm just blowing things out of proportion. But then he talks and talks and tells me that he's going to be out and about, going to see his friends and people that he hasn't seen much of lately. I told him I'd try to get done at 10:30 tonight, which I did, and he said that he didn't know where he was going to be, but he'll definatly be home by 2:00. That's all fine and dany, but I have my college placement test tomorrow at 9:00 in the frickin morning. So I asked him if he could give me a call at the Park Inn at 10:30. "Well, I can't do that because I might not be around a phone." Well Fuckhead, how hard is it to be around a phone close to or before 10:30? What, is he planning to go on a hiking trip in the freaking Congo? With people that don't have cell phones? Grrr... I made sure that I sounded especially sad on the phone, remembering the conversation that we had the night before about guys that never buy flowers or open doors and such. Thinking, hmm, maybe, just maybe he'll call me or stop in for a visit or do something kind of sort of nice for a flipping change! But, silly me, I shouldn't expect so much from him.
Did I mention that I have PMS? Maybe that's my reason for being so depressed and demanding. I wanted to call Dan today, but there were so many things to do so I didn't remember to call him until 9:15, and then I didn't know where to call him. I want to have band practice tomorrow, but Caleb is busy or something and I talked to James Wurdeman tonight while I was buying groceries and it sounds like Dan's going to Madison with him. We need to practice more!!!
Last night I had a dream about Aaron. I dreamt that I was at someone's house and he drove up to it and then drove away. I woke up pissed at him. I think I'm mad at Aaron a lot. But I'm not sure if they're legitimate reasons to get mad at someone. If they are, I should probably talk to him about it- maybe that's my problem, I play too many stupid mind games, I'm trying to cut back but I think that's just how I am. I don't tell him if there's a problem, I just change my tone of voice, mope a bit, and make sure that he knows he did something wrong. But when he asks me about it, I don't really tell him. Then again half the time I don't really know why I'm mad at him. Maybe that's it for me, I'll never have a normal relationship ever, and I'll die an old lonely cat lady with a hunch back! I know that I get mad or maybe jealous when he's around Amanda Marcot. Well the thing is, I know that they've had sex- and while that's enough to get me going, he hangs out with her. He says she's a really cool chick and when they're together he'll make some comment like, "Looks like you need some roughing up" and then he'll do his normal 'wrestling' thing or whatever. OK, so I know that he does that with pretty much everyone- especially girls, but with her it bothers me because I know where that has lead to in the past!
I give up!
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